from: frank suatoni
YOUR ITEM QUITE INTERESTS ME AND I HOPE IT IS STILL AVAILABLE FOR SALE ..I RESIDE IN CANADA ONTARIO TO BE PRECISE .I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THE FINAL ASKING PRICE AND THE CONDITION OF THE ITEM WITH SOME PICS BUT IT WOULD BE PICKED UP BY MY HUBBY'S CLOSEST CARRIER IN THE STATES .SO IF YOU ARE WILLING TO SELL SEND ME YOUR FULL CONTACT NAME AND ADDRESS TO POST PAYMENT TO YOU IN FORM OF LEGIT CASHIER CHECK.I NEED TO HEAR FROM YOU A.S.A.P TO COMMENCE ON
THE TRANSACTION ...
my response:
go kill yourself
go hang yourself
go play marco polo on the freeway
go eat razorblades
go play with cobras
go drink battery acid
go make friends with a tiger shark
and stop being a total jackass!
- Garit
from: Caroline Thill
Hello Seller,Good Day to you ,I reside in London UK, Am a registered purchasing and sales agent,in which my client has shown interest in your display item on craigslist so i will like o know
1)Did you accept certified cahier's check payment drawn from US Bank?
2)Can we trust you with the money
3)Will you be able to cash the check payment sameday you got the check at your bank?
4)What is the condition of the item
5)what is the final asking prce of the item
6)Will you be able to allow my client private shipping company to come to your house for the pick-up of the item from you down to where it is needed urgently?
7)Kindly send us your full name,address and phone number where the check payment will be mail out to okay cause the item is needed urgently.
Hope to read from you soonest
Regards and God Bless
my response:
Please accept this limerick I wrote as a response to your email.
you are without doubt the biggest loser ever heard of
i wish a giant meteor would rain death from above
and forever silence your incompetent banter
unless something could end your life faster?
nah, I'd still send a meteor with all my love
thank you.
here is an additional limerick a friend of mine wrote.
get an honest job,
you motherf'in knob,
you'll make money faster,
you stupid gay bastard,
if you decide not to rob.
ps we both wish you were dead =)
